Big Idea

In this week’s message, Pastor James Boyd continued our Relationship Status, by bringing clarity to the confusion around the topic of sex. In his message, “Surrendered,” Pastor James discussed how God created sex for the purpose of strengthening our relationships within the context of marriage, and how even when we are single, sex still has its purpose. Over the years, the enemy has influenced the world to pervert sex into a leisure past time for singles. Sex has been reduced to a physical activity we participate in, simply to fulfill the fleshly desires we have ‘in the moment’; however, sex – both for those married and single – has its purpose in establishing relationships we’ve always dreamed of. For those who are married, sex is a purposed pleasure to connect us on a deeper, more intimate level. For those of us who are single, the need for sex is designed to push us into greater intimacy with God. In both contexts, sex is designed to bring greater fulfillment into our relationships. Our first step in keeping sex within the proper context is by receiving forgiveness as we surrender our bodies and our sex life to God.

As we look to surrender our sex lives to God, it’s important to remember:

  • We are given a body, so we have the privilege to give it back to God
  • Shame comes from exposing something good in the wrong context
  • God uses sex to strengthen marriage; the enemy uses sex to tear relationships apart
  • Outside of marriage, love has nothing to do with sex
  • Inside of marriage, love has everything to do with sex

We can resist falling into lustful temptations by understanding:

  • When our relationship goals outweigh our immediate ‘need’, we are able to conquer
  • There is no separating sexual things and spiritual things
  • Sex in marriage is spiritual warfare
  • We belong to God
  • To surrender your body, you need to give the control back to God

We can give God control of our bodies by giving Him our:

  • Thoughts
  • Eyes
  • Ears
  • Mouths

Discussion Questions

  • How has the confusion around the topic of sex influenced how you view it? How has your view of sex influenced your relationships, both positively or negatively? What things can you do to help align your thoughts about sex with God’s thoughts?
  • For those who are single, do you find it difficult to refrain from entering into sexual relationships outside the context of marriage? What things make it difficult for you to say not to sex before marriage? How can you allow your need for sex to draw you into a closer relationship with God? How will refraining from sex help your current or future relationships fulfill their purpose?
  • For those who are married, do you view sex as something that can draw you and your spouse closer together? How do you think having sex with God’s view will help strengthen your relationship? What things can you do to keep sex exciting and fresh within your marriage?
  • For both those who are single and married, what things may make it difficult for you to surrender your sex life to God? How can you break past those barriers and give up control?
  • How have you seen the way you think, the things you look at, the things you listen to and the things you say influence your life? How have they influenced your relationships? What things can you practically do in order to help give God control of your thoughts, eyes, ears and mouths?
  • If you’ve struggled with sexual immorality in the past, how can you receive forgiveness from God? How will receiving forgiveness help you walk in purity? How will receiving forgiveness help your current or future relationships?
  • How can we help bring clarity to the topic of sex with those around us?

Important Scriptures

Romans 6:13, Genesis 1:28, Genesis 2:24-25, Mark 10:7, 1 Corinthians 7:5,9, 1 Corinthians 6:12-13, Matthew 5:28, Isaiah 53:5, Romans 14:8